There are certain 'life lessons' that come your way only when you go away. When you break your daily routine, immerse yourself in new cultures, and/or feel yourself change when going abroad. Even if you go away for a weekend or go on a one year sabbatical there are certain things I have realized that are a repetitive pattern. When I leave a place and arrive to a new one these ten points seem come up again. In my year in London I would jot them down on my journal and now I decided to put them all together and share them in one blog post. Hopefully, it can put these points into a different perspective by putting your energy on things that matter and let go of the things that honestly don't.
1. Time flies
Being a short period of time in each place I have lived really puts time into perspective. The first time I lived abroad was in Florence, Italy and I was there for one year. I remember thinking of all the things I wanted to do and see in the city. I felt there was no need for rushing in doing all the things I wanted to do since I finally was a 'local' and not a rushed 'tourist'. Before I knew it, the year was coming close to an end and I hadn't done half of things I wanted to do. I tried to do it all in the last few weeks but obviously didn't. It was the first time I realized that a year is actually a very short time. Luckily, I learned from my rookie mistake and now every time I arrive to a new place I take it by storm because now I know, time is limited and 'now' is all I've got.
2. Things don't matter
I realized this when I was moving out of San Diego after living there for two years. It was my first job and was making a livable income. Every payday I would go straight to Amazon and buy things for my place. Slowly but steadily things started to add up and even though my little house looked more and more cute, the cuteness soon vanished as I had to get rid of all of these things once I started moving out. I had accumulated so many little things and in the end they simply didn't matter. I had to drive from San Diego to El Paso in a Jetta, I decided to take only the things that fit and get rid of the things that didn't (I had my dog taking up a whole seat as well that I had to consider). I sold all my furniture, donated all the kitchen appliances, gave away clothes, and threw away so many things. Sure, having things is nice but being light on your back is even nicer. The road is long, you don't want to hurt your back along the way and more importantly you want to enjoy the ride.
3. Everything is temporary
You will never have anything forever but yourself. Everything is temporary, that includes people, moments, experiences, and even your daily routine. Time slowly takes the things we have now and we must understand that. Not necessarily cry over the fact but with this note, be more present. From day-to-day your life might not be so different but it is slowly evolving and before you know it a moment is gone. Learn to keep this in mind and value the things you have right now regardless if they are good or bad, everything has an expiration date.
4. You easily adapt to things faster than you think
It might be scary changing your routine, jobs, career, friends, cities, habits, etc. What I've learned from living in a few places is that you adapt to things faster than you think. When moving abroad of course, its overwhelming all the sudden changes and culture shocks along the way, but with an open mind and patience you'd be surprised of how well you can adapt. This has always been a shocker for me everywhere I move to, regardless of how familiar or unfamiliar the place is. Having a positive mind towards it is key and when it comes to language barrier or culture differences you have to be very patient. Time will pass and you won't even realize you can actually move around the public transportation effortlessly, you've become a local at your nearby coffee shop, and you've even have added a few new words to your vocabulary.
5. Your good and bad habits always follow you
One of the main reasons people move to a new place is for a fresh new start, a clean slate, a new and improved you. However, you have to be very careful because this new and improved you is not created in a day and definitely isn't going to happen just by moving to a new place. You're good and bad habits will always follow you, it's up to you to let them go or hold on to them in your new venture. I had very unhealthy habits when I lived in Monterrey as I was a college student and going out, drinking, and eating very unhealthy. When I moved to San Diego I had high hopes on changing my lifestyle to a healthier one, however my bad habits followed me there. In my first year there I gained even more weight and was drinking very frequently. My second year there I slowly tried to break out of these bad habits but I had very much adapted to some since they were now part of my San Diegonian lifestyle. When I was about to move to London I now understood about these habits following you around so I vowed to make new and good habits part of my everyday life from day one. I made the habit of not going to a pub after school, but instead going to the gym. I disciplined myself in not being able to go home until I had done a workout. I started to drink much less, eat a lot better, and being more productive. I also made myself read when using the tube and not just listen to music. All these little adjustments in my daily routine made huge changes in my life. Now moving to Mexico City I have effortlessly taken them here and feel so proud of it. It took me three years to break out of bad habits but these small adjustments have been extremely rewarding.
6. You value your home a lot more
The first time I left home I was so ready (sorry mom). In all honestly I couldn't wait to live on my own, be independent, and just live someplace new. As the years would go by, I would be excited to go home for the holidays, but once I saw all my family and friends I couldn't wait to go away again. It's been eight years since I first left home and now as I get older it actually becomes harder to leave. You realized that family and friends are by far the most valuable thing you have in your life and you have to enjoy at full capacity the short times shared with them. It has become the most bittersweet experience having to leave home then arriving back again for so many years. The bittersweetness is always hard to deal with but I have learned to just value home once I'm there. I have learned to see that the moments shared with the ones you love go up in value. Every moment shared with them is one moment less you will be with them. They say home is where the heart is and I like to feel the beat close to my chest.
7. The World widens
The term 'Más Mundo' revolves around this point. You become more knowledgable, your world expands, you simply know more. I believe that the best way to learn is through experiences and there is no better way to experience new things by traveling and getting out of your comfort zone. My best teachers are those I have met along the way that share with me their own experiences, culture, and self. Challenging myself to move to different parts of the world has thought me parts of me I wouldn't have discovered by staying put in one place. I talk about this a bit more here.
8. Everything becomes more accessible
By getting to know more places everything becomes easier; more accessible. The first time living in Europe I felt like I couldn't move without getting lost or getting hurt. Once I started moving around the continent I soon realized it wasn't as hard or as scary as I thought. Now, I know I can get anywhere easily and the only thing that could possibly stop me is myself. I am now confident that there is no place "I wish" I could go, if I want to be there, I will.
9. The places become stepping stones or chapters in your life
Moving from city to city its obvious to state I have been a different age in each place. As I have aged differently in each place, in my mind, I see every location as a chapter in my life. In each place I have learned different things and grown in ways only then and there I would have experienced. What I'm trying to say is when you look back to the years, you don't see them as "When I was 21" or "In 2014" but instead "When I lived in Barcelona", which I personally love. Chapters aren't just numbers they become much deeper than that.
10. Relationships may last a lifetime or be temporary
This last point might seem a bit harsh but it's the honest truth. In these past years I have made many friends from all over the place. I have had the most amazing experiences with many. Regardless if I have seen some more than once or never again, I know for a fact that the majority of them will just be 'temporary friends'. It is not because you left in bad terms but sometimes the distance, situation, and just life puts people in your life for a limited time. Other people cross your path to teach you a life lesson that can sometimes be disappointing but you soon realize they were there for a reason -- to make you grow. However, there are friendships that last a lifetime and 'complicated situations' aren't part of the vocabulary. No matter how far apart geographically you might be from them or if the communication is low, they are always there. My favorite people are those that keep crossing my path effortlessly, they are those I know for sure I have to keep close and cherish. Moving around has put my friendships to the test; I have seen which ones are real and which ones are just being slowly filtered out. I think a lot that if I would have stayed in one place for a longer time I might have been with friends that are actually there because we are just comfortable with each other. Being away has made me see who is worth missing and who is worth letting go. Keep in mind this isn't on me but based on the love we mutually share and a little bit of serendipity. Some are meant to be in your life forever, others are just temporary and that isn't necessarily a bad thing just a part of life.
