March 23rd, 2020
Omitted
I miss every hug, every kiss, every touch I have ever experienced just by the utter fact that I can't even graze a loved one. This sub-microscopic thing that is conquering every corner of our lives is taking full control of not only today but every plan, every meetup, every contact we planned on having in our near future. I will never take for granted being free. Free to roam, free to love, and even free to share a space with someone. I will never take for granted to travel, explore, walk through crowded markets and airports, sing along with a full stadium seamlessly word for word to our favorite song, to share a table at a restaurant with an old friend, and even to share a sidewalk with strangers. I went to sleep last night craving every touch with another human being I have ever had, going back to the memory and just reimagining the setting. I would hold on a bit tighter, stayed for a minute longer, kissed a little harder. We always miss what we don't have, always want what we don't own, and always wish to be where we are not.
I've repeated myself over and over that this too shall pass, that this too will end.
March 24th, 2020
Unfit
It is clear to me that we are unfit for you. We don't deserve you, we deserve this. We deserve being in isolation, in quarantine, being away from everything and everyone. We need this, it's our most alerting wake up call, no message has ever been so forward, so inevitable, and so necessary. We deserve to be nostalgic, to not be able to grasp what we want, to have our meeting set on hold, our plans, our goals. We can't stop until something stops us and finally that something has. It arrived slowly then all at once, invading what we thought could only invade the stories shown in the news. It has taken full control of our decisions, our makings and even our feelings. It has closed our doors from inside out, locked us in complete segregation of what we perpetually thought we had full control over. We have mistreated what we don't even own, what is not even ours. We are not fit for this world, for all of it, entirely. Earth is talking to all of us, if we don't stop now, it will do it for us.
It doesn't belong to us, we utterly belong to it.
March 25th, 2020
Unity
Being all over the place then all of a sudden in just one really puts things into perspective. We are all always scattered, dispersed in between everything and into all of us. Constantly migrating from one airspace into another, crossing in and out of borders, walking through doors and going onto a free open space. We have always shared spaces even though we are closed into our own thoughts, daydreams, and likings. We have been together by sharing a conversation, a table, and a roof. It has awakened the reality that I have never shared such a space with the people I have known the longest and deepest. This pandemic has herd us into forced unity. It has placed under one single roof as if it was our choice, as if we did this voluntarily. The word 'family' has never been so precisely defined until now. The word 'unity' in a moment of such division has never been so contradicting. We are all craving togetherness, feeling so away from everything, and yet we have never been more collated. Together, even though separate, we are simultaneously going against this nature.
We are all away together, all shoulder to shoulder only virtually.
March 26th, 2020
Execution
Define greatness. Just the word itself, great, delivers such strength as if striding forward into nothing but good things and amazing happenings. The Great Depression, however doesn't define such greatness. It may as well be defined as a virus, because it did a good job in spreading quick and heavily worldwide. It impacted the lives of many with one great knockout at the stock market. This virus was self-inflicted just like our most recent one, it was bound to happen, inevitably inflicting life as we know it. We today though have an advantage, we have inevitably built the Golden Era of technology, our holy grail against recession. We can create and execute with our innovative way of living through devices. Whatever it is that you do or want to do, take this as a time to get it done, to get it going, to get it running. To evolve it into technology, to have it stay alive by making it intangible. We need to realize that we have to let go of what is not surviving. This indeed is survival of the fittest, it is seeing who is the toughest because only the toughest can get through the toughest times.
March 27th, 2020
Daydreaming
I had a dream where I was just where I wanted to be. In a place I had freely chosen on my own to go and to be. I had arrived on a plane without fear, casually confident walking towards the unknown. Here I stayed in a small shared space with kind strangers. During the day we would gather together to share our thoughts through endless conversations all sitting around a table. We would share our past and our plans for our future but we would be foremost sharing our air, our moment, our presence. At sunset we would walk to the closest beach and share caned cold beers, music, and a blunt. As the day slowly would turn into night we would grow closer together, we were not strangers we became intimate, creating a moment that could have not been built anywhere else and in no other place in time. It was a moment that would mark us for the rest of our lives and at the time we weren't even aware of it.
The next morning we packed our things and each one of us headed into different directions, to new locations, onto new shared experiences.
And here I was daydreaming of a life without a pandemic.
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